Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
