i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
