We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
