How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
