I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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