lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
