bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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