I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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