R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize