My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
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