Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic