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She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
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