I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize