Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I need moral support for this bender
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Randomize
