is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
