By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
We're too hungover to prance.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
