Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
