dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
