I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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