Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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