Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
