that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
