Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
time to smoke my breakfast
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize