Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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