What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
