You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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