I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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