I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
