Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
