just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
