Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
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