I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
