your room smells of hookers.
And success
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
