how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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