? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
