you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
