I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
