So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
