What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
