sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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