Plan B is the new Plan A
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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