Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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