I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
