yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
