If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
