I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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