the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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