Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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