I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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