3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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