my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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